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Bugs in a Jar

by Morgan Powers

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1.
she’ll eat your heart out you’ll wonder where it where it all went wrong oh where’d it all go wrong? keep on distracting yourself from hell they saw it all along they saw it all along he thinks he’s different he thinks he’s different thought he was different thought he was different i’ll take my chances i’d like to be the one that you see all the time i wanna see you all the time i can’t feel my feet, think they fell asleep from standing in one place i’ve been standing in one place i’m thinking different i’m thinking different now i’m feeling different i don’t feel indifferent now i’m lucky that you don't care about the same things other people do, that other people do i need to wash my favorite jacket but then it won’t smell like you, no it wouldn’t smell like you i wish that i could keep this in a bottle how come we never feel the same way twice? i’ll take my time you take yours too cause honey i’m not through oh honey i’m not through with you making myself sick love is disgusting but maybe not with you, maybe not with you
2.
Real 02:59
looking in the mirror i see all the things that i could be if i try to be and looking out the rear you see all the things you could have been if you really wanted them high inside a dream you feel all the things you want to feel i’ll pinch you it’s not real i hold my breath I need you to come back such a pretty heart attack you’re such a pretty heart attack lying all alone at night someone tell me how to feel someone hold me til i’m real i’m real
3.
the sky paints your face a hundred different colors but this one is my favorite when i was a kid i kept bugs in a jar but they couldn’t breathe and they had to get out so i let them fly, now i finally share what i’m thinking about so you know that i care the other night i saw a shooting star maybe it wasn’t my first but i didn’t notice before and maybe i should start wearing my glasses around so i quit missing out on the things that surround me when i was a kid i kept bugs in a jar but they stopped lighting up when they could have gone far now i wouldn’t dare keep bugs in a jar i’ll just watch them with you while we lie in the dark
4.
Humans 03:37
humans love it when they hear you say their name helps us forget that we can always be replaced about a week ago i saw it on the news another story of some typical abuse and you shed a tear and gently dry your eye but you’ll forget about it until another person dies you ever walk into a room and then forget what you came for so you turn around and start again it’s kind of like that in the grand scheme of the universe we keep on screwing up and dying off until we’ve learned what do you think happens once we shrivel up and die? think I’d rather haunt a house than be offered another sorry try
5.
Mariam 04:00
mariam pulls my hair makes me cry at lunch mom says she wants to be my friend but I think she hates my guts mariam chases me kicks me in the teeth what did I ever do to her and how did she get so mean? mariam ditches school that's the third all week maybe she's tired of pulling my hair and kicking me in the teeth mariam comes to class with a big fat bruise kids say she got in another fight but Mariam never loses maybe she's not so mean maybe she's not so mean mariam rides the bus that's the first all week all of the seats are taken so i let her sit by me
6.
i know it’s not long before I go home but they keep looking at me in my flooded jeans i’ll just hide inside my hair i wish the world was a bit more fair but i’ve got friends and they’ve got me and pretty soon the bell will ring we’ll walk home get nice and wet because it rained today’s the best today’s the best growing up seems far away far away, far away falling down doesn’t hurt so bad when the floor is two feet away i’ll fall down and maybe cry but it’s alright cause i can hide inside my hair until the tears have emptied from my eyes i don’t know if growing up has happened yet, but we’re so tough we trade our toys for cigarettes it’s raining out, you’re soaking wet now we’re old where can we hide? we’ve cut our hair to fit the times i’ve got my friends and they’ve got me and when we cry the world can see growing up has not changed much you’re still the same just kinda tough now when it rains you go inside unless there’s tears you wanna hide
7.
Cellar Door 05:25
draw the curtain, lock the cellar door you can’t be certain what goes out and what goes in what’s on your mind? delicate and fragile like the vinyl in my bedroom if you’re good i’ll let you play the one you like why’d we say those things we didn’t really mean? why’d you laugh if you don’t really think it’s funny? i hurt your feelings and i hope you know i’m sorry doesn’t matter cause she’s leaving in the morning penny for your thoughts and dear, i swear that i’ll be better if you share with me, share what’s on your mind satisfy a craving, i’m earnestly awaiting did i sing it right, was i out of key? why’d we say those things we didn’t really mean? why’d you laugh if you don’t really think it’s funny? i hurt your feelings and i hope you know i’m sorry doesn’t matter cause she’s leaving in the morning i never wanted this, i never wanted this to happen left the keys right where i asked her to, but took a part of me with never want to waste your time or steal away your peace of mind i never wanted this, i never wanted this to happen why’d we say those things we didn’t really mean? why’d you laugh if you don’t really think it’s funny? i hurt your feelings and i hope you know i’m sorry hope to god i see you sleeping in the morning
8.
:P 03:12
feeling like a baby softer than i’m used to stay here for a long time won’t you? see me in the fall time when the leaves are changing but you know that i will feel the same running round in circles, i’m glad you stuck around til i sorted all my shit out now I keep the photos we took on my bedside and think of you every night if you’re feeling down or messing up i’ll be around to pick you up feeling like a baby, softer than i’m used to stay here for a long time won’t you? see me in the fall time i’m glad you stuck around
9.
Ocean 04:12
criminal you steal all my sleep vandalize my every dream can you see what you’re doing to me, can you see? if i press my ear to your chest would i hear the ocean? breathe sold me to the night skeleton, he hangs in my closet i hid the keys but why do i bother? does it make me a fool, would you make me a fool if you knew? if i gave you my hand would I get all that I’m hoping for? you should know that I need no one and i’ll go away if you please the shadows melt right out of my mind when i see your face, it’s been a while your scent alone could make me cry i just want to fall asleep with you if i press my ear to your chest would i hear the ocean
10.
For You 03:45
my sweetheart, i bought you roses it turns out that you’re allergic i’ll never buy you things again you chew me up and spit me out you turn my spirits inside out wonder if you ever think of me probably not but baby i can dream some things are just too good to be true so i’ll just wait on the other side of the moon for you i go to church but i don’t believe in heaven if you won’t have me i close my eyes, i don’t exist until my name escapes your lips wonder if you ever think of me probably not but baby i can dream some things are just too good to be true so i’ll just wait on the other side of the moon for you
11.
hideous creature, it’s nice to meet you you are not a boy or a girl they try and fix you, they tie up your hair you just let it fall to the floor you lost your notebook you tied up your hair why’d you let them push you to the floor? was never an issue to get them to kiss you we all ended up missing you but hideous creature, i’ll never forget you you were my favorite friend so pick up the pieces we can glue them together you are still the same as you always were
12.
times change, so do i so do you, there’s no need to cry you move away and start another life i’ll see you again, i’m sure of it said doctor, won’t you fix me? see I grew up, i lost all my leaves didn’t look twice before i crossed the street, got run over by a time machine didn’t hold my breath as i passed the cemetery now i’m haunted by your memory life’s so sour and life’s so sweet but we’ll be fine, i’m sure of it we’ll grow old we’ll lose all our teeth i’ll see you again, i’m sure of it
13.
Quiver 02:15
woke up in the morning while it was still early wish i didn’t feel so tired like you warned me stayed up way past midnight wondering about you guess I’ll make some coffee i don’t feel like i’m supposed to wish we paid attention but maybe we’re afraid to didn’t wanna say this, i didn’t wanna hurt you standing all alone now quieter than ever think my heart is breaking i think i saw your lip quiver woke up in the morning while it was still early i wish i didn’t feel so tired like you warned me

about

by morgan powers

if nothing more, this has taught me patience. i wrote these songs in the stairwell next to my dorm last year and recorded them at home over the past months. i'm grateful i can share something so important to me, i hope you can enjoy something on here.

a big thankyou to my best friend sebastian sabatin for mastering it<3

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released May 22, 2020

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Morgan Powers Chicago, Illinois

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